Health Guides
Spontaneous Play
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We do not stop playing because we grow old. We grow old because we stop playing. -unknown
Spontaneous Play
The phone company has been working in our neighborhood installing new cables. Two weeks ago, during part of an early morning installation, they hit a major power line and cut power and phone service to 600 homes. The repair crew estimated that it would take two days to restore the power and phone service. I was in the middle of several large business projects. Since I office at home, my first thought when this happened was, what can I do without access to my computer and emails? I caught myself before I went too far down this path and shifted my focus to what was the opportunity in this situation?
Often what we label as problems are really opportunities. In the Chinese language the same character is used for both a crisis or problem and an opportunity. Another way of looking at this is different sides of the same coin. So when I flipped to the other side of the coin, I immediately saw this situation as an opportunity to play! It reminded me of the snow days we used to have in school; when we had an excuse not to go to school and instead we could play in the snow.
I really needed a break from the projects and with this spontaneous gift; I decided to fully enjoy myself. Instead of worrying about all the things I should be doing, I decided to listen to my heart. I took a long walk and then sat outside and finished a novel. I met a friend for a leisurely lunch and browsed stores that I had been wanting to explore. I purchased spontaneous gifts to surprise loved ones. By early evening the power was restored but not before I had experienced a wonderful, energizing day!
I learned two things from this day. The first was to quickly shift to see the opportunity in an apparent problem. The second was the benefit of spontaneous play. After the much needed break, I returned more creative and revitalized for my projects.
Where do you need a break in your life right now? Are there some opportunities disguised as problems? Look at something you are labeling as a problem right now. If you ‘flipped the coin’, what is the opportunity in the situation? Watch for the signs that your need a break: frustration, short-tempered, low energy, no motivation. What would happen to your outlook, creativity and energy if you had a day or hour to follow your heart? Think of something fun you would love to do if you had an unexpected break and then create one!
Vicki Miller Copyright July 2005
As a Life Transition Coach I work with clients to identify what’s most important to them and prioritize around these values. I help my clients identify and remove obstacles in the way and bring clarity and focus to their dreams. What is your dream? Are you undergoing a major transition and not clear where to turn? Call (972-306-4489) or email me, (coach.v.miller@verizon.net), to set up a complimentary, no obligation 30 minute coaching session. Download my FREE e-Book, 12 Fun Ways to Change Your Life, or sign up for my FREE monthly newsletter at http://www.thrivingthroughchange.com
More infomation at WikipediaThe Importance Of Self Care
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Big week. Very big week. I had some larger than life meetings with some people who can actually help me make my ultimate career dreams come true. Its exciting and can be overwhelming, but Ive realized the importance of one thing.
I need to step back and take care of myself when Im busy. Its the best thing I could ever do for myself.
Take a client of mine who recently had a launch of her new product. There were the parties and the fund raisers. There were the meetings and the press events. There was excitement, and the fulfillment of a dream that she had been working on for many years. After the big event, she was sick for a month. Colds, flu, congestion, aching, you name it, she had it. And as soon as she got well, she jumped on a plane and did a tour promoting her product. She ran and ran and ran herself into the ground and itll be no surprise to anyone to hear, she got sick once again.
Another client I work with dealt with another stressful event which ultimately caused her illness. This lady is a manager and had to cover during work for a few employees who were out with pregnancy and a surgery. My client is completely capable and able to do the jobs of her co workers well, but the stress got to her. She ended up caving and fell ill at the end of her ramped up time. She ended up missing several days of work in a row as a result, which ultimately did not help the department. As a matter of fact, it COST the department. It slowed down the work because of the several sick days.
What these two clients had in common was that they put their work before themselves. They put the goals of their company before their own, and sacrificed over and over until they made the sacrifice of their health. They ended up having to take off a lot of time from work after the fact and their work probably suffered while they were there because both of them worked while they were sick.
Putting ourselves first often sounds selfish. It sounds like were self important or too good to work too hard. Nothing can be further from the truth. If we value the company or our work, well value ourselves first. If we take care of ourselves, well be strong for our company. If we take care of ourselves, we wont get sick after the busy time, or stressful times.
Taking care of ourselves means different things to different people. To me, it means getting in exercise several days a week and eat healthy foods. It means getting lots of down time, to be alone and to read and write. To me, it means getting to spend time laughing and playing with my son and reading to him or drawing with him. To me, it means connecting with my husband and getting to hear about his daily events that take place. It also means, connecting with my family and my friends via phone or in person. Lastly, it means that I have prayer time, and complete quiet time where I can just listen.
I find when I do these things, and take great care of myself, and have a lot of time just alone or being with my close circle of friends and family, I feel more productive. Im more creative, and Im happier. I feel more centered, and more balanced. I lose the anxiety, and the stress. I can also handle more stress because I feel stronger.
Its taken me years to find the formula that works for me. I know immediately when Im out of balanced. I start losing things and my clothes pile up in my closet. My desk gets overly cluttered and my house looks messy. I start getting a bit pudgy and my clothes feel tight. My nails and my hair start to look worn and I dont feel the inner spark that I love to share with others.
So like today, in the midst of my excitement, I took the morning off to spend with my dog. She needed me. She had a cough. So I took her for a walk. I read my bible and I wrote in my journal. I spoke with my mom a few times and emailed and called a dear old friend. I spent time out on my porch just reading and soaking in the sun shine. Later, even after work, I felt good. I handled some parental stress that is a part of a working moms day such as dinner, bath time and getting a splinter out of a screaming childs finger. I handled it all with grace and ease. I felt fine that even though there was a bit of chaos around me, it didnt affect me. I was in the flow and it felt right.
When we finally get this lesson about taking good care of ourselves, weve usually already done it wrong for a good many years. I sure did. I used to live on adrenaline and was a complete junky. As a result, I never felt really good. I was overweight and out of shape. And, Id prefer to not go back there.
So to challenge yourself, just review for yourself what YOU need to do to feel good about yourself. Do you need exercise? Do you need a special meal? Do you need to bask in the sunlight or get a massage? Whatever it is, make it happen. Trade massages with someone else if you have to, but figure it out.
Your body will thank you. Your mind will thank you. And ultimately your life will thank you, and reward you, just for taking care of yourself.
Mary Gardner, The Charisma Coach! Is and executive Communications and Lifestyle coach, speaker and consultant. She travels the country appearing on news programs promoting her ideas, and hosts a popular blog at http://www.marygardner.com
More infomation at WikipediaEverything You Always Wanted To Know About How To Get A Life But Didn’t Know Whom To Ask
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Question 1
How do I get more time to play?
Answer: Schedule it in. Why? Because if you dont schedule it you will generally let other things have a higher priority and put yourself and a life further down the list. So just write 15 minutes a day, play time into your diary and dont change it for anything. To get started, get your diary NOW and write in one fun thing you have been hanging out to do. Call a friend and tell them that you are going to do it, and DO IT today. Question 2
What happens when I feel guilty for not working?
Answer: Get over it, and value yourself. Here’s why: Emotions like guilt are more damaging to your health than physical stress. So, when you feel guilty for taking a break reward yourself for noticing and tack an extra five minutes playtime onto that break. If you give yourself a hard time for feeling guilty you add more stress. Relax and realise you are human we all need a break. Even your computer gets downtime and goes into energy save mode. Question 3
How do I stop myself getting frustrated with life?
Answer: Realise your expectations are just that, your expectations. Why? Because you only get frustrated when your expectations are not met. Get over that you cannot control everything or everyone. Relax and go with the flow. Ylang Ylang essential oil helps release anger that can come from frustration. It helps you relax and enjoy life your life. Vaporise it at home and work to relax. Question 4
Where do I get the discipline to say No?
Answer: Realise discipline is easier to handle than regret. Here’s why: You cannot turn back time, and regret sucks the life out of you. Saying no to stuff that is draining your energy for life, feeds you the energy to keep saying no. Consider living by the rule If its hard to do, all the more reason to do it. If you play that game, you have self-discipline and can say NO easily.
Question 5
How do I leave work on time?
Answer: Make you the priority. Why? Because you are the only one in control of your life and its only you who can make it happen. Start telling yourself and everyone else that you finish and leave work at 5pm. If you keep saying you never get away on time, you wont. Use positive language to get what you want. Question 6
What happens if I ask for what I want?
Answer: You will gain the respect of others for actually asking for help. Here’s why: People admire people who are straight and honest with them. It helps validate how they are also feeling. We all basically want the same things in life, but most people wont show their humanness and ask for what they want. If you dont ask in the first place you have no possibility of getting it. So create the possibility and ask for what you want. Question 7
How do I get a social life?
Answer: Get out and meet people. Why? Hiding from life only fuels the problem. Stop using work as an excuse and an avoidance tactic. Go for quality people and outings not quantity at first. If you need to be in control, bring people to your safe place like maybe home or local caf and have a casual dinner or lunch. Question 8
Why dont I feel deserving of rest time?
Answer: You have too much fun whining about it. Here’s why: It’s easier to complain about stuff than to do something about it. If you respected yourself and took quality rest time, you would have nothing to whine about. Wow you would be happy. Shock. So, get off your soapbox about not having enough time and not being deserving and get on living the happy life you deserve. Question 9
How do get more energy for life?
Answer: Do something you enjoy. Why? You always naturally have the energy for the things you love doing. So just change your perception to what you are doing. If you tell yourself you are tired and life is now fun. That is what it will be. Change your perception to what is happening, tell yourself you have all the energy you need and you love life. Question 10
What happens if I dont plan for play?
Answer: You wont get it. Here’s why: It’s easier to do something for someone else than for yourself. So schedule it to the tiniest detail like you would a task at work, and focus on the joy that playtime will bring. Planning to this amount of detail feeds you energy and excites you into doing it more often. Write tomorrows playtime in your diary right now. Question 11
How do I get balanced?
Answer: Allow yourself to be human. Why? Because no one person or thing is ever perfect. You will drive yourself mad trying to be perfect. Being balanced is noticing if you are not balanced and taking action to rectify it. For instance if you have extra coffee today the world will not end, simply have two extra waters to balance it out. Question 12
What do I do if Im in overwhelm?
Answer: Stop and breathe. Here’s why: Breathing keeps you alive. It really does. If you dont breathe when overwhelmed, you will never think straight to get yourself out of it. So stop, breathe, see what is really happening compared to what you think is happening and deal with it. Question 13
How do I take a block of time off?
Answer: Plan ahead and schedule it. Why? Something will always come up otherwise. Commit to your health and wellness. Time away from work is the time you will get your best ideas, because your mind is free to be creative. If you dont already have a break of at least two weeks planned for this year, do it now. If you need to apply for the time off, apply today, then work out where you want to go. Question 14
What happens when I dont eat properly or I skip meals?
Answer: You increase your chance of losing your life. Here’s why: Food is the fuel that keeps you alive. Its that simple, and the first thing that goes hungry is your brain. How can you think straight if your brain is not nourished? See food as a fuel and behave in your eating six days a week and have one FREE DAY a week to let loose. Question 15
How do I make me the priority?
Answer: You stop making excuses and do it. Why? You deserve to be happy and to enjoy life. Get a close friend to keep you in check. Each time you are copping out and not looking after yourself, ask for their help. And you do the same for them. Be honest with each other, plan for fun and get a life.
About Jennifer Jefferies
Life Balancing expert Jennifer Jefferies is one of Australias best-known authors and speakers. Jennifers simple, practical and proven 7 Steps to Sanity can help bring balance to anyone who wants to have it all without sacrificing their health, sanity or sense of humour along the way. Jennifer is a qualified health practitioner, who speaks to corporations throughout Australia, New Zealand and Southeast Asia, sharing practical real-life strategies that help people to improve their health, wellbeing and productivity by finding balance in their lives. Jennifer has also written numerous books and e-books and life balancing products. You can contact Jennifer at:
Jennifer Jefferies International Pty Ltd
Po Box 4298,
Elanora, QLD 4221 Australia
Phone: 61 7 55986035
http://www.jenniferjefferies.com
